unspoken words

Dearest,

i reason this would be the first letter i have ever written to you. i decided to do this bcos it keeps me right on track with our dear Lord Jesus and helps me to focus, not to date the wrong guy kinda thing. i want to guard my heart and keep it till you come along, and let the Lord give you the keys. people keep on asking me, why havent i date. for goodness’ sake! im just 17! why are they doing that? its bcos teenagers nowadays are dating at a younger age.. much much younger! they are all brought up in such an environment that dating is just for fun. but no dear, i want to marry the person i date. which is you. one boyfriend = one husband. that has always been my conviction. i know the day that i meet you, you will definitely be happy at how i guarded my heart before u come along. at how i walked right with the Lord. how i trusted in His divine plans, not following what the world says. dearest, i do not expect u to have guarded ur heart like i did and am doing. bcos u might be from a non-christian background and maybe have done many wrong things before u came to know the Lord. but i just wanna let you know how special u are to me that i kept my heart pure and precious.

dearest, at 17, its so easy to fall for someone and give my heart away without being physically intimate wit someone.. js the feeling kinda thing. but i dont want this to happen. i need to tell myself that i should view brothers as my brothers in Christ, not as potential partners in the future. if i did that, i would have defamed d Lord’s Name. im not trusting in Him that way. i want to trust Him. and I am doing it. i want to see Eccleasistes 3:11 happen in my life.

there is so many things that i could share with other people. like toys, maybe i could share it with my brother. books, with sisters, etc and many other things. but simple things like holding hands, hugging, and etc.. im going to wait for u. some people view holding hands as very casual.. they think its ok. but im gonna wait for u. bcos those are things reserved for courtship to me. if not whats so special about courtship? im going to make sure i have something for you that i did not share with anybody else.

i have read of girls who gave away their first hugs and kisses to guys they do not even know their names. when they came to know the Lord, and married, when they hug and kiss their husband.. memories of their first times came to mind. i dont want that to happen. its so painful, its really sad. they are unable to enjoy that moment. enjoy that moment with that person whom they love. all my first times are gonna be for you. and i know the Lord would keep me on track as long as i desire to please Him. He will bring you to me in due time. i dont need to search for you. =) i think thats all for my first letter. i dont want to see you so soon. i always thought that im going to meet u 10 years from now. maybe it will be shorter, or longer. but it doesnt matter. even if u dont exist, it helps me to keep my heart guarded. either waiting for u to come, or using my singleness to serve Him all d more! =)

in Christ,
ling